Nak diceritakan tapi pada siapa? Kalau setiap kali aku luahkan, kau membentak. Jadi aku pilih diam. Aku lebih selesa begitu sebab aku terlalu takut untuk bertekak. Kerana aku gusar, lama-lama perasaan sayang ini hilang. Tapi bila difikirkan balik - semakin aku diam, semakin aku geram. Semakin aku melawan, semakin sakit aku satu badan. Either way, I'll get hurt.
20 tahun hidup tapi kenapa aku tak tak faham-faham lagi. Sakit itu lumrah. Samaada orang sakitkan kau atau kau yang sakitkan diri kau sendiri. Senang je konsep dia tapi aku ni bebal sangat kot. Susah nak faham. Konon tough nak simpan dalam, tapi easier said than done. Perit simpan dalam ni. Dia membesar dalam badan macam barah. Lama-lama, pecah lah dia and keluarlah segala isi. Time pecah tu, it won't be pretty. Time tu, tiada kesempatan untung mengundur diri. Dah takde masa nak menyesal dah kerana masa tu, segala benda yang keluar dikawal oleh emosi. Dan setiap benda yang dilakukan/diucapkan ketika emosi menguasai diri adalah selalunya perkara yang menyakitkan dan tak boleh ditarik semula. In the end, you'll hurt, not only yourself - but also everyone around u.
And thats the last thing I want to happen. Tapi sebab dah terbiasa sangat buat, sekarang dah susah nak ajar diri ni to let everything out. Semua benda simpan je. Semua benda kalau tak puas hati, cakap takde pape. Sampai bila nak simpan dalam je kerja?
Sampai aku mati. The end.
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Monday, February 13, 2012
Random update
What do you feel when you see random photos of ordinary things that you can find in the streets or even in your house that look so beautiful and artistic at the same time? I envy how some people can just take pictures of anything and turn it into something so fantastic. The above picture is my (failed) attempt to capture the street light while the car was moving. I don't have my own camera so I used my BB instead and I just have to say that BB camera sucks. It's 5 megapixel but it's not as pretty as taking pictures using an iPhone. This is the only reason why I missed my old iPhone. I wanna be able to capture everything I see and share it with the world ( or at least with anyone who cares) but for now, I'll just have to make full use of my BB.
Another thing is I feel like i'm coming down with a fever and this is not good. In a couple of days, I'm off to Melaka to attend a top secret training that requires me to speak. But this sore throat I'm having is making my life a living hell. :/
How the hell am I going to speak for hours now?
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